The Unrealistic Skinny

there is this standard of setting a trend of being that one
ballsy person that stood-up-for-full-figured-women-everywhere.
"she's anorexic", "society has an unrealistic perspective on perfection",
"our daughter's are watching"
is this not realistic that people are born with smaller figures? with skin
barely draping their bones and a metabolism that should win Grammy's
for it's performance? what makes a large woman more beautiful and
realistic than a tall, skinny woman?
the reality is that these woman provoking such asinine claims are the same ones
who struggle with their inner peace.
the same woman who has the daughter who pinches her thighs only because she
learned from watching the best.
the same woman who is screaming from the rooftops "justice for the fat lady" because she is
wrongfully treated by society, yet in the same breath is screaming "skinny is
disgusting".
the same woman who is fighting for size equality, as long as it doesn't include skinny.
the same woman who genuinely thinks she is fighting a good fight for unity across
the board for women everywhere, yet creates a division great than Moses and the
Red Sea.
the same woman that is pointing fingers out saying "this is not beauty", all the while
insinuating beauty is only skin deep.
the same woman who goes to sleep at night thinking she has fought a good fight,
but really joined forces with the opposition.
the reality is we are in a society where it's justifiably O.K. to say "Oh my gosh,
you're so skinny", "You've lost so much weight!", to a co-worker, but to turn around and say,
"You're so fat", could make a person millions richer in a lawsuit.
fight your good fight, but leave judgement out of it. be who you need to be to make yourself
happy, but don't set a standard to defend those who don't need defending.
some people are comfortable being skinny, some are comfortable with their "more
cushion for the push'in", but don't you dare try to live in someone else's shoes.

4 months ago

i questioned

life.

love.

loneliness.

2 days ago i quit

doing the asking

and answered

my forever.

mrs. ferrell has a nice ring to it,

but not as nice as my engagement ring!

one stroke

a little too close for comfort.

but he feels like

chicken noodle soup.

i wonder

what

happens

now.

do our eyes meet

and our hearts

take a seat.

hey

im your speed bump

do you ever feel like youre a dent
or a stop
or a speedbump in someones life
to something better?
its hard to understand people
when we're all humans and we spend our
entire lives trying to figure ourselves out.
we are a twisted people
to those who give us so much
we return so little
and to those who we give so much
they return so little
do you want me here?
is this a way you play hard to get
or are you trying hard to get away?

i realize that when something monumental almost...

happens in my life, i run to this blog

to blurt out my thoughts.

this music mix of a life i lead seems to have hit platinum.

let me be your busy.